The Wait
After 7 months of waiting, on Monday the wait was finally over, I finally got my appointment to see the Neurologist again. I made sure we left early and the one I care for said he wanted to come along with me for some support, so off we went. We were not far from the hospital and we were still quite early so we decided to pop into Tesco’s to get a few bits. I still wanted to be quick in there although the one I care for was really taking his time, I asked him whether he was going to have a fit. We got over to the hospital and the story was the same, he was walking very slowly although now he was starting to look a bit vague. I booked myself in and he sat down and I kept looking over, he seemed like he was about to go. I told the lady that was booking me in the he was epileptic and I thought he was going to have a seizure. I was advised to get one of the nurses should he do so and by the time I got to him he was in the trance before the seizure. I had to warn a few people nearby that he was going to have a seizure and one lady helped by going over to get a nurse as I was over him, making sure he didn’t flip about too much. The nurse came and by which time he was starting to fit, the whole room was pretty full and everyone was watching. Myself and the nurse were protecting him, she was in front of his chair and I was behind him. After his seizure, it all went quiet then a couple of minutes later, he had another one, this time, a lot bigger so we had to hold onto him pretty tight. By the end of this one there were more nurses about and they had called for some doctor’s also. The nurses thought it was his appointment today but I had to explain I was the patient, it was a right old palaver. The next thing they couldn’t get him to come round so they had to get a hoist to get him onto a trolley and out of the waiting room. So his timing couldn’t have been better, the appointment I had been waiting for so long had been disrupted by one of his seizure’s. We then had to go off to a room around the back and I had to answer all the relevant questions the doctor’s were asking. I told the nurse’s again it was my appointment today and how long I had been waiting as I didn’t want to lose my slot. After some time, tests and questions the doctors decided to cart him off to A&E and I could have my appointment and then meet him after.
I had my appointment with the Neurologist and by this time my head was all over the place by what had happened. I managed to get through some of my list of symptoms but then he took me into a room to do some general Neurological tests. I didn’t get a chance to tell him the rest and he told me he wanted to stop a couple of the tablets I was taking. Both are very low doses and suggested that I go on this new one and suggested I had some CBT for the anxiety. I didn’t get the chance to ask him what his diagnoses was as I was quite blank from what had happened although he seemed to suggest a pain disorder and a nerve related issue. I have since looked up the tablets he want’s to put me on and they are linked to one of the possibilities I thought I had. I am not best happy about this either as there are some side effects from these tablets which are not the best. I have decided to order some natural stuff which a friend mentioned some time ago and see if this helps in the first place. As I have mentioned before, I have started to get a lot of anxiety relating to taking any kind of medicine and the truth is there are side effects. I have been going through this for the last for the last year and it has really taken its toll on me but I want to fight it at the same time.
I have been doing a lot of walking recently and I have been feeling better for that, it’s a shame I can’t use my cross trainer right now. The last time I used it, I woke up with such terrible back pain I was considering calling an ambulance. The walking has been good and if I get my strength back up and some good results then hopefully I can use the trainer again. I have bought a little trolley also for when I go shopping, which takes the weight of the shopping and the stress off my body. I like to walk to the supermarket rather than drive as its good exercise and now I have my little trolley it will allow me to continue… 
Off my trolley 
Tough
Gosh it’s been a tough old couple of weeks if I am being very honest what with my health problems getting me down. Most days I have been in pain one way or another and what with being in hospital last weekend. The thing is my depression hasn’t been too bad lately although when things like this happen it can start to drag you down. I am having to take painkillers most days and I try my best to take as little as possible these days but have to if I’m in pain. The good news is, it’s a week on Monday when I finally get to see the Neurologist about all of my symptoms and hopefully he will be able to help me find some answers. The problems started as early as September 2011 with the first attack on numbness in October when I first saw a different Neuro. I am seeing the top man this time, so I am told, I was offered an appointment only 2 weeks earlier but it wasn’t with the one I am going to see this time. I decided to wait as a friend of mine had a Neurological illness and recommended this doctor and explained that he was the top one of the hospital. Also she had a good experience with him and told me how good he was and considering the first one let me down and discharged I am glad not to be seeing him again. I would have only given him a piece of my mind as I was really upset and I didn’t even get my follow even after chasing his secretary.
Today the sun is shining, which has also cheered me up a bit and also my back is not hurting like it was yesterday so onto a better start. It’s my nephew’s birthday today so need to go out and get him a present, it’s also my Dad’s on Sunday so need to get something for him also. It’s my sister’s wedding next Friday so I am hoping to be well enough to go to that and then take their present’s along there. I haven’t seen the family for a while either so it will be nice to see everyone for the day so it’s fingers crossed that I will be ok.
I have been in touch with an old buddy of mine from year’s ago, we met up a couple of times recently and he really seems to cheer me up. We get on like a house on fire and have a good bit of banter and he message’s me most days to see how I am doing. The one I care for has been a nightmare most of the time lately so it’s nice to have someone cheer me up. I mean what with everything else that’s going on for me I really don’t need any further hassle or stress but the one I care for doesn’t seem to consider that. Still had a nice chat with my old buddy last night and that cheered me up some more and it’s nice that he always messages me to see how I am doing. It’s just nice to have something in my life at the moment that make’s me smile for now………
Oh and PS I still have some more wristbands to sell for my charity project so if you haven’t got yours yet or would like one then please see:
http://personalitydisordersupportnetwork.com/pdsn-wristbands/
A nice pic from Kent
Not Enough Time
Hello again, where does the time go when you are busy?! Once again it’s taken me some time to get on here, relax and write to you and tell you what’s been happening. My word where do I start…… One of the last things I talked about was, I was having a full body massage. Well, I went to the college and had it and oh my, it was amazing, just what I needed. The therapist was only small but she had good strength and it was an hour and 15 minutes of pure bliss. By the time she was finished I was almost in a trance and didn’t want to move for a while, he he… but eventually I did. The students there are working on hot stones at the moment so I am hoping next week that I can book for a hot stone massage. After my massage I was pretty hungry and the college also has a restaurant that they also train in and guess what at discounted rates! I had my lunch and a coffee there and it’s was all good, spent £13.50 in total with the massage so was a very happy bunny!
Some of my Christmas presents that I ordered on-line have started to arrive so it’s starting to get exciting now. I still have a lot more to come yet however and I did order a few more presents since the last time I wrote on here on the last time. The main thing I need to get next is lots of wrapping paper to wrap them all up. Oh and lots of ribbon and bow’s to make them look all pwetty
Now onto a rather annoying note…. I was meant to be having my MRI scan last Sunday and was all ready and set to go when on Saturday I got a call. It was about 11am and the person on the phone said my appointment had been cancelled as one of the machine’s has broken down. 
I was like, could the timing be even worse, I had been waiting and worrying for 5 1/2 weeks and it only breaks down the day before! I told him I was really stressed about my symptoms so if they got any cancellations then I would be willing to go. I didn’t hear anything for a few days so I gave them a call and low and behold my appointment is now on 2nd December. So now I will find out my results a couple of weeks after that, it’s been a horrible long wait. I am still suffering with most of the same symptoms, mainly the dizziness, spasm’s and the tremble’s when I’m laying down. I have stopped drinking squash as it contains Aspartame and most “no added sugar” soft drinks do. Should the outcome be that it is MS then Aspartame can aggravate the illness and has even be known to cause it. What I do know from watching all my on-line stuff is that Aspartame is a kind of poison and really isn’t good for the body either way.
While we are on the subject of films, I watched a good film the other day called “Thrive 111111″ which is all about suppression and how money rules the world. The film gives you a different angle on things and points out how things like free energy and cancer cures have been stopped as people high up like making money. The film show’s you how the 3 main people pretty much control the world, The Rockefeller’s, Rothschild and J P Morgan. Funnily enough I have just checked and all the links to the films have been taken down, if it does come back up again, I highly recommend it.
I have also been trying to work out again and been doing some gentle workouts every couple of days, my mood is slowly picking up a bit. I am going to try to stick to it for a while as I know it helps my mood and as long as I don’t go too mad then it will be fine. When I workout too hard I have found that I feel really ill afterwards so I know that something is going on with me. It’s my birthday next week mind you, so would be nice if I lose a few pounds for that and it will also put a smile on my face.
Apart from that I have a lovely stew on that my 2 cats were watching me prepare, looking forward to that, should be ready in about an hour, yummy!
Shopping
I was round my friends a couple of days ago and he was asking about my cats so I said to him why don’t you come over and see them and so he did. I brought my friend round and he stayed at mine for a couple of nights in the end and had lots of fun playing with the cats. This is the friend I talked about some time ago that had some troubles with his health with a very serious condition. The same friend that I went to visit at the Royal London Hospital and would also visit him at his place which isn’t too far. The only problem is he makes these noises with his mouth all the time and it kinda stresses me out so was glad to drop him off yesterday, lol. I know it’s mad but kinda got this phobia of those sort of noises or people who are noisy eater’s, etc…. I know I need hypnotherapy or something really as I feel like it makes my blood pressure go up and it’s bugged me for many years.
The last couple of days I have been rather a busy bee also, been getting myself organised for Christmas this year as I did last year. I managed to go online and buy nearly all of my Christmas shopping, I am just hoping that t comes on time because last year was a total nightmare. On the first day I got most of the big things, like the main presents and yesterday I got the smaller ones, the post man is going to be busy over the next couple of weeks, he he. Glad to have got it done though, one less thing to worry about, seen as I have had a lot on my mind lately……
I have my MRI scan this Sunday, yes Sunday, that’s a funny day for a scan but that’s when I am booked in and then another 2 week wait for the results. I haven’t been trembling so much the last few nights although I still have the dizzy spells and the patchy numbness so one way or another hopefully I will find something out. In the meantime however I have started to doing a bit of light exercise which has started to pick me up a bit. Earlier this year I noticed that when I had been doing strenuous exercise I was feeling quite ill afterwards, I am not sure if this linked to what is going on with me either.
On the up side mind you, I am going for a full body massage later this morning at my local beauty college and they do it at very discounted rates. I went last week just to have a back massage and it was really nice and relaxing so a full body and head is going to be great, can’t wait!! I will let you all know how it goes and promise to come on here and write a bit more often……..
Oh and one more thing, I would like to thank Lisa at https://www.facebook.com/mentalhealthfoundation for supporting my blog and posting links to my fan-page and blog. I have passed the 2000 hit count now and for this, I am very grateful and happy! 
Just a pretty sunrise
A Little Charity
I have been a busy Bee the last few weeks, the one I look after has been asked to move. We have been over his place trying to clear out as much as we can as he is only being offered a smaller place. We have given loads away to Help The Aged Charity which makes us feel good. The good thing is they even come to collect whatever items we have but we make sure it’s worthwhile. We have been moving furniture out also but the only problem is the council will only take items at a time so it’s taking some time to do.
The thing is the people asking him to move aren’t making things easy for us so we have decided to seek some further advice. The only reason he is being asked to move is the fact they are saying the place is too big for him. On the other hand he has lots of reasons why he wants to stay in the place with one of them being that he was born there.
As for me at the moment, I have been doing well most of the time, I have had the odd occasion of anxiety but it’s not been too bad. I haven’t been able to exercise much as I’ve managed to hurt my shoulder now, doh! I have been doing some walking however and carried four bags of heavy shopping home the other day so it’s not all bad! Plus the fact that we have been busy here moving things about so that must be burning calories also. My two kittens always keep me busy also and they are such a delight to have and have brightened up my life.
My depression has been a lot better lately also, I don’t feel nowhere near as down and I have a lot of motivation. I have suffered with it for most of my life so it’s nice that it’s not dragging me down at the moment. The fact that I have so much going on and not enough time to worry about my problems really help, so keeping busy is the key.
The fan page is going great, we’re almost at 200 fans now and new people are joining every day and we all share the same understanding. So if you haven’t already then come join us…….
Coffee
I bought a new espresso / cappuccino maker just before Christmas and oh lord what a saviour it is! I love my coffee and it means I can make coffee shop style coffee in a matter of minutes, yum yum
Well, I made it for my run this morning, 86 minutes, not bad considering I had a bit of time off. I feel good although my knee was hurting a bit so had to give up there but I think that was enough anyway. I feel much better for doing it and know I will be soon back up to 98 minutes or more. I feel better already and I am looking forward to the part when all the weight starts falling off, he he.
I spent more time today working on my new picture show that I have been doing for my volunteer work. I am really happy with it and I am trying to send it to my supervisor so she can have a look, I am sure she will love it too. I also thought of an idea when I was out running today so sent a letter of and know who’s I may get a reply, will keep it at that for now as if it works out then I will tell more.
Grumpy has gone off to his place today, however I asked him to go as he was being mean again, got to put my foot down otherwise he tries to walk all over me. No doubt he will be back later but had a nice bit of peace, doing my work and not being asked questions or being annoyed at the same time.
Tomorrow is rest day from running so will probably do some more cleaning, it’s nice to clean the place for the New Year. Apart from that there’s a running jacket I’m after so might pop to the shops to see if they still have them. Other than that a nice relaxed evening ahead of me, healthy food and maybe some more coffee
1 week to go!
Well it’s one week till Christmas and finally I am starting to feel a bit better, all the working out must be paying off. So far this week I have done 2 eighty minute runs, mind you the bottom’s of my feet are pretty sore! I was thinking about doing a workout today but then thinking if I have another days rest then tomorrow’s workout may benefit
Finally I have all my Christmas presents sorted, I had to have a last minute dash to the shops yesterday as most of my presents got lost. I wouldn’t mind but I ordered them in November and the stupid courier company managed to lose them. Since they were lost I have been chasing the order and keep being told they are coming. Well that wasn’t till yesterday when I spent about an hour on two phone calls only to find out the replacements hadn’t been sent out! I was fuming, although for some reason I was shouting, swearing or screaming, I was quite calm in fact. So that was it, I got in my car and went to the shops and replaced all the presents and came home and wrapped them all up. Not bad really and now I just have a nice big fat letter of complaint to write as the service I received was terrible.
I have a table full of presents and I am nice and organised, have got food for today so I don’t have to join the shopping madness. I am sure the shops are going to be packed out so thankfully I can concentrate on the housework. I am still quite worried for the one I care for however; as he’s still drinking and needs to cut down. I got up this morning and he had drank more than I wanted him to and I know he will be feeling the effects later. The cold weather just gets to his nerves, that combined with withdrawal’s just makes him shake. I am really worried that he might not even make Christmas and end up in hospital as he has a number of health problems. I do my best to try and help him and it’s only he who can cut down and him only. I have bought him lots of wonderful presents for Christmas and he has for me but the best present for me would be for him to be better.
